Removing Facebook from my life – Week 1

For 2017, I made a commitment to myself to not use Facebook personally. I made this decision because I found myself too often staring at it scrolling through the thoughts, shares, photos, videos, and more for my over 900 friends and pages which I’m a fan of. The amount of time I was wasting wasn’t helping me be more productive or my mental state. The term “Shit or get off the pot” constantly floating in my mind. And don’t for one instance lie to me and tell me you don’t look at your phone while you are in the bathroom. I’m happy to report my pot sitting time has decreased immensely since the start of this experiment. On January 1st I wrote my “goodbye” and posted it on my personal Facebook and on my blog. I intend my blog to be my Facebook, or Jaxalogue, if you will. It is a place where I can write whatever I want and share it with the entire world/internet. By dialing JaxAdele.com you are getting a direct line to me. No need to log in or endure ads (other than what my free WordPress may issue.) Just visit and browse. As I become more consistent I intend to add search features to allow you to access the type of information you are looking to acquire from me. But to start, I just want to share my week.

The Parent Trap

Ever find it fun to watch movies from when you were a kid and evaluate how you felt about them before to how you feel about them now? I do it all the time and with Netflix ever rotating their lineup, The Parent Trap was recommended. This 1961 movie was later revamped by Lindsey Lohan but the original role was played by Hayley Mills. The stop motion intro/outro sequence along with the original songs make me long for the old movies before things were outsourced, CGI, or done for marketing reasons. I will always remember the words to “Let’s get Together.” Even the simple camera tricks they use to have Hayley Mills play both roles, makes me think I CAN have a conversation with myself fairly easily in a future YouTube episode. It also made me think of the MEMEs I saw so frequently on Facebook where a character would talk to themselves, one good, one dark. That being said, I screen grabbed this.

HayleyMillstoHayleyMillsDivorce.jpg

The subject of divorce is something I always ponder. Having been divorced I find it interesting to find comments of divorce in my childhood entertainment. I figure everything had its influence on me. The understanding even in 1961 that eventually everyone is going to be divorced is just sad. Moving on…

Another bit which caught my eye was the fact that Sharon/Susan’s grandmother didn’t like her short hair. She called it “hoydenish.” This is one of my greatest joys with closed captioning. I can read everything they are saying because hearing fails me at times. (I had some scaring from an ear infection as a baby which has hindered some of my hearing through out life.)

hoydenish

My thoughts on gender identity are fluid. Why does it matter if she is identifying as male or female? How does hair effect her gender? Obviously, we understand what the grandmother is getting at, being 1961, but THE GRANDMOTHER HAS SHORT HAIR. Is she trying to be a boy? Why doesn’t she make up her mind. The reason for the haircut plotwise is that she’s not Sharon but rather her twin sister Susan pretending to be Sharon. So rather than having a conflicting gender identity crisis she’s having an actual identity crisis. Grandmother should be asking “Who is she?” instead. Hayley Mills face is priceless and I can totally relate to this scene. If you were wondering,

Hoydenish or hoiden

noun
1. a boisterous, bold, and carefree girl; a tomboy.
adjective
2. boisterous; rude.
It’s one of those words that I’m still learning but love to find due to their gender connotations. And as Cher from Clueless would say:
Tryusingitinasentencetoday (1).jpg

Hello, Dolly!

I watched Hello Dolly. Have you ever seen this movie? It’s a musical from 1969 directed by Gene Kelly, starring Barbara Streisand and Walter Matthau. Immediately I realized Dolly’s ingenue towards entrepreneurship. She knows everyone and can help you get anything done. I thought it was funny that I could relate to these characteristics seeing as how I am a consultant or Jax of all Trades to the small businesses I help. Upon further inspection, I came to find Dolly to be manipulative and conniving. Dolly is the star of this movie but not a role model in the slightest. This musical is degrading to women and the songs aren’t that great. There are large dance numbers which I felt were overcompensating for the costume and music. The early 1900s were not a period of fashion I particularly like. The way songs are delivered are so showboat-y that they eliminated the ability for feelings. I never felt that I cared for any of the characters at any part during the movie so whether they succeeded for failed was moot. I did watch it until the end just to be sure. I am ever intrigued as to why so many people are in love with Barbara Streisand.

Below I will give you two songs from the movie to watch if you want. The title song, Hello, Dolly!, is a call and response. She literally tells them what she wants them to sing to her and they comply. Even Louis Armstrong is under her spell. WITCH! Then there’s the backwards thinking It Takes A Woman. I dislike woman hating but I’m not the type of woman to like the things Walter Matthau is singing about so maybe the awful Dolly Levi actually deserves it. Either way, take it for what it is.

Hello Dolly, by Barbra Streisand from Raphael Mendes on Vimeo.

Oprah Winfrey’s What I Know For Sure

https://read.amazon.com/kp/card?asin=B00J6UKBPE&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_AX5Cyb45JPD2M I’ve been trying to read more and do things that will grow my brain and keep me ever thinking. With the addition to the Overdrive app to my phone (since I removed the Facebook app) I have been able to download audio books and ebooks from my local library. I have also visited the library frequently this week. While working one day at one of my less thought intensive jobs, I had my headphones on with Oprah’s book What I Know For Sure. Oprah is every positive and encouraging. It’s obvious that her book is geared towards house wives who watch her show but I still enjoyed hearing her reiterate things I already knew for sure as well. If you don’t nourish yourself, you can’t nourish others.  Apply that to anything. Focusing on your self care and your impact will be greater. Oprah also brought up the idea of writing everyday 5 things you are grateful for. I probably will never consistently do that but the idea to recognize things you are grateful for is a great concept. I am attempting to put this into my everyday life.

I enjoyed listening to Oprah read her book and suggest it to you as a positive boost to your life. This book will not bore you or bring your mood down. We can all learn to be more like Oprah. Aside from her Weight Watchers investment, she’s a pretty smart woman.

Radio plays

Similar to audiobooks through Overdrive and Audible (which I am using a free trial for), I have been able to download radio plays. These are classic books retold by famous actors from their time and typically an hour long with cute commercials for soap or detergent. Their like vintage podcasts with a point. I’ve had thoughts of my own podcast, only because I think I talk to much, but the dramatic retelling of a form of media also intrigues me. Everything I receive, I interpret and digest. And you will find out what comes of it here.

Apartment Hunting

This week I spent a good portion of it talking with my future roommate, Batman/The Dark Knight. We are looking for a 2 bedroom in the Attleboro area. Most of this weekend was spent going from apartment to apartment. It’s crazy to see the varying degrees of apartments, their prices, their lack of closet space, and what we want to live with. We found a few good ones and are preparing to submit our application for 3 of them to see what comes back. Once we know what we can have, we will make a final decision and I imagine I’ll be moving sooner than expected. Things I like in an apartment, easy access from highways and to find for guests, closet space, full sized oven/fridge, washer and dryer access, and the less creepy the better. Some buildings and hallways just don’t match the beautiful inside of an apartment.

YAttleboro

YAttleboro is a word I came up with to organize adults in Attleboro who are between the ages of 24 and 39. Attleboro is a family town but there are many of us who are single or in committed relationships but don’t have kids. It’s my mission to find them and collect them for social engagement. In doing this, I have made two new friends this week. One through the internet, the other through a mutual friend. It’s funny to see how close in proximity these people are and I might never encounter them previously. I’m the kind of person that if I see someone in that age range sitting alone at a restaurant or bar I walk up and have a conversation with them. I usually start by introducing myself. I encourage you to try making friends in your community. Seriously, you never know who you are going to meet.

Cooking

With my recent move and vacation to Florida, I haven’t been cooking much, so once I was done with work for the week, and with the impending storm ahead, I took some time to buy groceries. This lead to a weekend full of marinated drumsticks, french toast, pancakes, roasted potatoes and more. My temporary roommate, C, seemed to enjoy my jump in to domestics. I enjoy cooking, especially because I get to control what is in the food. Quality over quantity. C claims he can tell that I don’t use dairy but I suspect he’s just making fun of me. Because we all know, Dairy is the devil.

Helping Others

I help people at my job. Often not directly as I am a fundraising coordinator and the funds I raise go to support the program which helps people, but this week I got to help someone directly. At the beginning of the week I was asked to take a friend, P, to Braintree so he could catch a bus to NH. On days when a firm schedule is not in place, I am more than happy to rearrange a few things to help a person out. I was glad I could help P make it to the train. I look for opportunities everywhere to help people in my daily life. My offers aren’t always taken up but they’re still out there.

Wedding Planning

I have no shortage of projects and things I am working on but when one of your best friends asks you to design her wedding dress and be her wedding planner, you say “YES!” Staci had asked me but this week showed progress since our phone call when I was in Florida. The date is set, the ideas are in place, and I have the ability to start working on invitations, wedsite, and dress pondering. I know Staci’s personality and her initial thoughts on her dress. I intend to have a few sketches hopefully by the end of this coming week. Stay tuned for more on this glorious June event as I hope to feature it on my blog once it’s commenced. I will share minor updates for myself but will keep the majority of the information private for the couple.

Fashion Design

My 2017 goal is to work on a series of outfits based on a theme to be presented at a live event a la Fashion Show-esq. The theme has been decided and I will be working with Brenescoto Designs for original jewelry design. More will be announced in another post but if you are interested in supporting my efforts please make a donation here: paypal.me/jaxadele. In talking with a friend last night, he asked “how much is that going to cost?” I realized that although I could come up with a quote for exactly how much the fabric, supplies, venue rental, food, and general operating expenses would cost, I haven’t figured them out yet. It will come and my hopes is that the designs will help my portfolio, help me reach my 2017 goal, and perhaps sell a few of the designs to compensate me for my efforts. If you are interested in being a model or attending the event you can sign up for fashion updates here: Google Group for JaxDesigns or email me directly at JaxAdele@gmail.com.

Hidden Figures

On Friday, everything I had planned cancelled on me. Before I would hunker down for the snowstorm I wanted to get out. I wanted to see Hidden Figures. I had seen a few of the previews and I knew it was a story I wanted to learn more about. My buddy L said she would meet me. It was the first time I went to Showcase in North Attleboro. They require you to pick out your own seats and they are leather recliners. Plus they put in a bar so you can take drinks to your seat. I didn’t get a drink because it was already late and I didn’t want to fall asleep. The movie didn’t start on time unfortunately but that gave L and I plenty of time to talk and watch up. We even looked to see if my future roommate, Batman/The Dark Knight, was around since his movie started shortly after ours. We missed each other. But L and I enjoyed the movie. It was about the three ladies who literally fought for our country to excel in the space race. The funny thing was, they weren’t fighting the commies, they were fighting segregation and human rights among intelligent NASA employees. The obstacles these women had to face due to their gender and race, were portrayed in a relatively light sense. They were some of the more successful stories of struggle. They pioneered the way for all of us to believe in what is right and to fight for it. I think the movie was excellent and a great story. I am interested in seeing if any of those ladies have a biography available for me to read. I love stories of powerful women. I sincerely hope all the stories within the movie were true because their police escort to work after breaking down on the highway was priceless. Kevin Costner was also great but probably delivered one of the silliest lines in the movie. “We all pee the same color.” I was the only one in the theater who laughed out loud. I laugh because it’s true and because to think that people were discriminated against and forced to use separate facilities to relieve themselves is absurd and preposterous. I hope we can all remember that as trans rights become an ever current topic. Trans rights are human rights. We are all humans and we all matter.

I hope all of your have enjoyed your first week of 2017. Mine went very well. There is more than I have even mentioned and this will lead me to write more often. Perhaps video updates? I’m unsure but will work towards it. I encourage you all to be the best version of yourselves you can be. I want to see you sparkle!

XO Jax

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