All work and no play makes Jax a dull…

Well that’s not entirely true. It’s not so much play as much as creative play time. It’s something essential to my being. When I don’t get it, I deplete. It’s apparent in my behaviors and patterns. When I allow myself to be creative and recharge, I feel more like me, Jax. Creative play can be as easy as making someone a birthday card and as complicated as working on a friends wedding dress. It’s the time I use to focus on something outside of myself. It’s not typically digital. It’s a dress, or a painting, or a pretty cake. I am a maker. I make everything or at least try to.

The older I get the more I understand myself and how exactly I function. The more I understand, the easier it is for me to notice my slumps or mood changes. I can be proactive and work towards improving them.

Awhile back I had noticed that I was focusing on work so hard, that I was forgetting to recharge my battery. My boss at one job told me I had lost my mojo. Had I? At first I just laughed and shrugged her off, I was seeing someone at the time and thought of mojo as a sexual term. I didn’t think I had lost my mojo….but maybe she meant my creative mojo. I set out to fix this problem which was timely since my friend’s wedding was approaching and I had the dress to make anyway.

The focus on the dress, the problem solving it took to accomplish the task, and the overwhelming sense of accomplishment once it was done did the trick. I had my mojo back and I began using it on starting new projects. I’ve been keeping up the mojo since this happened but I’m keenly aware now of how important it is for me to keep working on my creative endeavors. I can’t just work and party/relax (whatever you call it). I have to be creative to keep going.

DSC_3771

DSC_3296

Jax doing her job. 

More on the wedding dress and wedding to come.

Thanks for stopping by! Jax

The Sun Chronicle: Snapchat’s new location feature has plenty of critics, and fans

Just a quick post to let you know that life is random. I don’t use Facebook like I used to since January 1st. When I do go on, I see The Sun Chronicle and DoubleACS in lieu of random postings from friends and acquaintances. That being said, I saw a request for quotes about SnapChat. I “liked” the post instead of writing anything. The author, Abigail, reached out to me and we had a discussion. Some of my quotes, as well as my niece Kristie’s are in this mornings article. Check it out here: http://www.thesunchronicle.com/news/local_news/snapchat-s-new-location-feature-has-plenty-of-critics-and/article_da76e1db-5077-50fd-82b0-bbeb6ae98af2.html

Got to love local news. 🙂

Happy Monday!

Motif Magazine: A Backyard Oasis

Compared to my last two Motif articles, this one is a bit different. On Page 13 of Motif’s July issue, you will find a fun summertime piece by me! Page 12 is an article by my best friend Fallon Masterson. Check out the whole July issue online at http://motifri.com/JULI2017/ or click the image to read the article because the image isn’t clear enough.

Please help support independent local news sources such as Motif by becoming a Patreon.  The issue is out monthly in Providence now and you can find it Online and at many local watering holes.

MotifSun

Quitting the Corporate World – 1 year later

At 30 years old on April 8th 2016, I quit the corporate world….for the 2nd time.

The first time was after I had been headhunted from one major company to another. I spent a year there understaffed and completely miserable. Miserable because the accounting world was not for me. I was a Hello Kitty band aid covered sore thumb among a sea of paper cuts. I tried a year of doing my own thing and starting my business. Eventually personal life required me to go back to work so I could move out of my ex boyfriends house and be on my own. I was back in the corporate world and living on my own. To refresh your memory, here is an episode of J. A. X. where I recap a day in my life.

I am not afraid of hard work. I actually prefer to put in real effort and watch the progress before my eyes but if you haven’t noticed…there is something different about me. I am constantly trying to figure out where I belong. Where I can be most useful and feel fulfilled. I am a people person. I am creative. I am a gosh darn unicorn.

When I left the second time, it was because I had enough of the early morning commute and was given an opportunity which would allow me to focus my efforts closer to home which was now Attleboro. I took it and it made me happier.

Since I’ve left the corporate world, I’ve moved to the Non Profit sector. Currently I am the fundraising coordinator of On Common Ground which is basically a mix of a hustler and event planner. I also took on a part time job at the Attleboro YMCA. I’m a lowly welcome center representative but I like the lack of responsibility once I leave the facility. I get to work with the public, be responsibility for the security of the facility while I’m there, help people, and I get to work out too. I’ve made some nice new acquaintances too. Did you even know the YMCA is a 501(c)3? It’s a pretty great organization and I highly suggest it over another CORPORATE gym place. It might cost more but what you are getting with your membership is more than a gym, it’s a place to belong, a community and people who actually care because as we all should know….as strong community has strong people in it.

The YMCA builds community through healthy living, youth development and social responsibility. On Common Ground builds community through social responsibility and engagement.

I have to admit that I think about going back to the dark side because the money is so good but it hasn’t happened yet. Out of the 10 years since I left college, about 8 have been corporate, 1 year being a nonprofit unicorn, and a part time 2 years self-employed helping my clients and colleagues in all different capacities. Who knows where life will take me next but I know I will continue to “Be the change I wish to see in the world.” (I wear a ring that says this everyday.)

XO Jax

Update and My next fundraiser – Blessing of the Bikes

In February I was all consumed by People for People. A community talent show and live auction to benefit On Common Ground. It was hosted by George Leonard of Georgie Porgie and the Cry Babies fame (I met him at the Attleboro Still Rocks benefit last summer) and included talents like my friend Bazz and the amazing Ally Beard. That girl is going places. You can check out all the photos here on Facebook and make sure you like the organizations page.

George Leonard and I take pulling the 50/50 raffle winner very seriously.

After that happened, I got sick. It knocked me on my butt for a whole week. Never have I been that sick. Now I’m finally settling into my new apartment and routine with my two part time jobs. (Yes, you can visit me at the Attleboro YMCA Downtown location in the evenings Tuesday-Thursday. They have 2 pools.) My roommate Batman/The Dark Knight is awesome and we have a very Star Wars theme we are working on throughout the kitchen and Awesome Room #2.

Thankfully because I see Batman/The Dark Knight regularly, it reminds me that I should utilize the PSA video capabilities of the wonderful DoubleACS. So I head over one day, very tired and filmed one for the next fundraiser, The Blessing of the Bikes. Check it out.

If you are a motorcyclist or rock and roll lover, consider joining us on May 13th (rain date May 20th) for a great time to support a great cause. We have three ticket options available. 

Hopefully we will have another successful event and then I get a mini break before Seeds of Hope in August and Oktoberfest in October. Hope you who are reading this is well. I always say I will work on writing more, but I’ve also just started working out. So I’m slowly building my good habits and it’s only April.

XO Jax

Men, Romance, and Today

I’m single. You are probably well aware of this.

I am looking for the right guy. I’m not sure when I will meet him, I thought I had already found him but was mistaken. My divorce corrected that. I don’t want to get divorced again which may lead to me never marrying someone but that doesn’t mean I won’t have a special someone in my life. I’m open and waiting patiently.

When I watch TV I am confronted with people starting, growing, and ending their relationships. I don’t think I watch a lot of TV but some days I need to turn part of my brain off and I turn on the tube. This evening in particular I watch Jess and Nick of New Girl talk together as exes to discuss what they were doing wrong in their current relationships. I later ran out of new TV and moved to nick@nick with Full House on. I’ve been watching Fuller House on Netflix and being able to go back in time was perfect. It was the episode with Jesse dealing with the thought that he might not be smart enough for Becky. It ends with them having a fight over his machismo behavior at a party. Then Jesse realizes that he was wrong and serenades Becky outside her apartment before they have a real conversation about his insecurities and fears about losing her. You can enjoy the sweet sound of John Stamos below.

I can see how scenes like this and others shaped who I was drawn to. My exhusband wasn’t anything like Jesse Katsopolis but I remember those early days and him serenading me after classes at Emerson in his North End apartment with his guitar. The boy could sing.

But let’s be realistic people, I’m not in college anymore. Guitars are rarely sitting idly buy waiting for a pretty girl to go by. Instead now you have to get to a point where you go over each others apartments and maybe, just maybe if they are actually interested in sharing their hobbies with you, rather than just sucking your face off, they might pick it up to show you their skills. And the skill of playing guitar or singing isn’t even what were actually looking for because what we want is romance, vulnerability, and emotional intimacy.  The serenade is just the romantic act which leads to the next.

So where has romance gone in a modern world where initial introductions are done by electronic messenger boxes? Let’s pretend for a moment that their photo on the dating app is their face which I see in passing from across the bar. Their profile is the assumptions I make from looking them over, I’m a bit psychic. (And not to go off my visualization but you can read a lot off of a person. You’re not just wearing that [insert fandom] t-shirt because it looks stylish and sophisticated.) So I either catch your eye across the bar and you initiate the conversation or I walk up to you and make a joke about something stupid I’ve observed in the bar. We might talk a bit or even make a date but now we have each others attention. There’s no real wooing. If I like them then I try to keep their attention. If they like me then they try to keep my attention. This attention is wrapped up in text message responses. If they don’t respond that’s it. You move on. There’s no grand gestures of romance, I guess in today’s age, it would just be an emoji.

face-throwing-a-kiss